floodgates there nomore

i did close it all.

i did keep well.

but why is it open now?

i boxed up my feelings.

i pushed people away.

i didn't allow me to keep anyone to myself...

i shut the door.

i locked it up.

i threw the key.

but how is it that its now ajar?

the floodgates are open,

and nothing can hold it back.

the flood has come again,

bringing with it the dread,

how did i let such a little thing break me down,

how is it that it was allowed to creep up to me slowly,

how did i let this happen to myself...

i had allowed myself a little faith.

i had told myself to trust.

i must have forgotten for awhile...

it must have left me that instant...

Maybe i was just looking for something to hold on too

To believe there could be someone to catch my fall

To believe someone would care to catch me

i forgot... i must have forgotten...

*haih

the closer i get to you,

the more clouded my logic.

the more i get to know u,

i forget the promises i made to myself.

the further u pull away from me,

i find myself finding ways to make u come back.

the closer i get to you,

you have inadvertently been mending me.

one smile at a time,

u mend my broken heart.

the more i get to know u,

my ice cold heart seems to be melting

i feel a warmth again, where there was no more before.

the closer i get to you,

the urge to scream at the world has lessen

i feel more at peace

i dont feel like i am done

i no longer feel lost

the more i get to know u

i find myself smiling suddenly

i find myself humming beautiful tunes again

i find myself happy again...